On the 24th May after 5 gruelling weeks in a hospital that dismissed all our concerns, Dani was transferred to a specialist hospital. I remember my phone ringing , i just woke up from my nap and my dad was on the phone. I knew something was wrong just by the way he said my name. He said ‘Dani’s got cancer’ and i just remember feeling like i was going to die. I remember the feeling of dread. My dad told me not to worry and that it was curable and he had a good chance, but those words meant nothing to me. There was still the chance he wouldnt make it. I remember my dad saying some other things to comfort me but all i would say is ok. My mouth was talking for me, i knew he was saying something but i remember it feeling like background noise and all i could hear was my heart pounding in my chest. Dani has a rare form of leukaemia called Burkitt lymphoma leukaemia.
I cant remember much else from that day. But my anxiety had gotten so bad i was shaking and vomiting all day so i wasnt allowed to see my brother because i had to appear strong and normal infront of him. I wasnt allowed to cry or drown in my depression, i was straight away told to be strong for my brother. I had no choice but to smile. I didnt want dani finding out he had cancer. Dani had a tube put in his chest for his treatment. I remember coming home and crying myself to sleep every night. Dani was starting to wonder why he had tubes in his chest and why he was being put to sleep for lumbar punctures. So we were advised to tell him. I made the decision to tell him he had leukaemia, i remember breaking the news to him and i remember how well he took it. But dani didnt know leukaemia is blood cancer. Had i told him that he would automatically link cancer to death. I told him he had some bad cells in him which needed to be removed so his good cells could repair his body. Over the next 2 weeks dani had intensive chemotherapy and lumbar punctures every 2 days. It was the hardest thing in the world. I wish it wouldve been me. I remember begging and crying asking why god , why him. Hes just an innocent child. I lost all my faith that week. I would cry till my eyes hurt.
His hair started to fall out and his mouth would bleed, he stopped being able to eat so he had to have an NG tube put into his nose. I remember seeing his hair fall out in clumps. He would sleep for days at a time and was vomiting if he was awake. He stopped being able to walk or go to the bathroom, or even lift his head up off the bed. I watched my brother deteriorate infront of my eyes. Every time i slept at that hospital i remember watching him go to sleep and checking him every now and again to make sure he was still breathing. Dani didnt talk for a week, he was in so much pain. He would get fevers where he would shake uncontrollably.
His sickness got so bad that the other end of the NG tube came out from his stomach through his mouth. He was so scared but he would tell me he was ok. I remember him saying im ok im ok , while the nurse pulled the tube out back from his nose. He never complained, he just took all the pain life threw at him. So far he has months of chemo left before we even find out that the treatments working. But this is Danis journey so far. Danis favourite superhero is batman.. little does he know, hes the bravest superhero ive ever known.